Deprivation

I used to be obsessed with shopping. I used to have moments of weakness where I bought anything and everything I wanted even if it cost me $500.00. I don’t know where I got this from. My Mom hates shopping. But in some strange way shopping became very therapeutic for me growing up. Whenever I had a bad day, shopping was the only way to make things better. So either I used to have a lot of bad days or I had a problem. Fortunately, I am able to talk about my problem in the past tense. I no longer go shopping when I have a bad day, I buy ice cream. It is a much cheaper way of making things better but not necessarily healthier.

I bring this up because I am experiencing clothing deprivation. Seriously, the last time I bought a piece of clothing because I just liked it instead of needing it was 1.5 years ago. It was a blue tunic style shirt from New York & Company. I know it sounds strange that I can actually remember the date and what I bought but it just goes to show how important it was. I made the mistake of signing up for notifications of sales from Banana Republic, Old Navy, and Gap. So, this morning I received yet another email telling me that I could get 50% off of selected items! Sometimes, I just delete it right away knowing that even though it is 50% off I would still pay $30 for a shirt. Other times, I say it won’t hurt just to look. And occasionally, I fill up the virtual shopping cart and smile at all of the beautiful selections that I have made and then frown as I quickly exit out as if pretending I didn’t just do that.

I seriously sometimes feel like I need new clothing. I am tired of wearing the same outfits day in and day out. I need variety. But then I look a Neil’s corner of the closet (yes he only needs a corner) and I can’t remember the last time he even got something new. But yet when I bring that up he says he doesn’t need anything. When I bring up that more than half of his shirts are starting to get holes in them and his favorite pair of jeans has a hole in a place that you shouldn’t go around in public in, he still refuses the fact that getting a new pair of jeans would be a good idea. In summary he just doesn’t understand.

Now, please don’t take this the wrong way—we are not incapable of buying clothes. If I chose to re-work our budget I could buy all the clothes I could dream of but we’ve decided that we want to travel while we are young. So we cut out a few things like extravagant clothes buying and seeing movies (which definitely would be my next topic of deprivation) in order to travel. So perhaps, while I am traveling more this year I may not feel so deprived but for right now I think I need to cancel those enticing emails.